


Free Falling

by Celinchen29



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Developing Relationship, Eventual Smut, F/F, Parenthood, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-29
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:21:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24442774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Celinchen29/pseuds/Celinchen29
Summary: It's been a year and a half since Lexa has lost her beloved wife Costia. Completely overwhelmed with what happened and her new responsibility as a single mother of their children Claire and Aden, she's throwing herself into work. But suddenly her parents in law who had always been looking after their grandchildren decide to move to the other side of the country so she's looking for a nanny. Enter Clarke, student of educational theory and most importantly hot as hell.
Relationships: Anya/Raven Reyes, Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Costia/Lexa (The 100)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 103





	1. Prologue

_Your side of the bed is cold, empty. Even after all this time I still haven’t washed your sheets because their smell reminds me of you and sometimes when I’m laying in bed at night, somehow it feels like you are still there, right beside me as if you had never left._

_It’s funny how the little things that always used to annoy me are now the things that I miss the most about you. Like how you always wanted to sleep in and wrapped yourself up in the sheets like a burrito while I got up early to get my morning run in. And how you used to get drunk with Anya outside on the patio, whenever she came over to visit. How you always got creative in the kitchen, coming up with the weirdest new dishes, always refusing to follow the recipe… And me, I know I have not always been the most caring wife and maybe I could not always treat you the way you would have deserved but darling I swear, if I could turn back time and if you could come back again and we had another chance, I swear this time I would love you right…_


	2. The Move

“Oh look who’s finally here to pick up her kids!”, Carole exclaimed. She was outside working in the little garden in front of the house as Lexa got out of the car. “I’m sorry Carole, you know how it is, work’s been pretty busy these past few weeks.”, she apologized to her mother-in-law. Words could hardly express the love and affection she felt for the woman in front of her, who had been nothing but kind and loving to her from the very start, treating her as one of hers even after the incident.

“I know, I know, work’s always busy for you but you’re also a mother and the kids need you.”

After hugging her very tightly for a few seconds, Carole’s hands rested on her shoulders: “You’ve been okay, honey? Have you been eating enough? Gotten enough sleep?” This had become some kind of ritual between the two of them. Carole asking her if she was okay whenever they met and every time Lexa was touched by the genuine care and worry she could see in the woman’s eyes and hear in her voice. She hadn’t done a very good job taking care of herself after the incident but she was on the right track again, getting better day by day, slowly but surely. “Yes, I’m fine, thanks Carole.”, she said, trying to sound as convincing as possible. “Good!”, Carole nodded, “You should come in then. There is something we need to talk about while the kids are still doing their homework…”

“I can’t believe you’re doing this… “, Lexa could not believe what her parents in law just told her.

“Lexa, honey, it’s been a year and a half now and although it may not feel like it, life goes on and the world keeps on turning. You can’t pause life so we should just…”, Richard’s greatest strength was probably his calmness, no matter how hopeless the situation he always seemed unfazed by it. But right now, in this situation, it was the worst thing he could have said, at least that’s what Lexa thought. “Wait, so you’re telling me that I should just get over it and live on happily ever after as if nothing had ever happened?!”, she was seriously enraged by now. But again she was only met with calmness “You know that that is not what we’re trying to say here, honey. We’re just trying to tell you that we can’t go on like this. You know how much we loved her and we think about her every day but as selfish as it sounds, we also have to think about our lives now and how we want to spend what little we have left of it…”

The worst thing about all of this was that no matter how hard she tried and how sad she was about it, she did actually know all of those things and she couldn’t even blame them for wanting to leave. After all they had done and the things they had given up for her and the kids, she could never be mad at them. But still, it didn’t change that feeling of being left alone. Apart from Anya they had been all she had, everyone else had left… but maybe that was just how things were supposed to be for her now, sooner or later everyone leaves and she’d just have to get used to that.

“Mom, you’re here!”, Aden got up from his chair, running towards his mom to give her a big hug. He always seemed to be happy to see her but he seemed to be the only one these days. “Hey, honey!”, she said, forcing a smile. Lexa had become so used to this smile that sometimes it felt like it was real, like she was really smiling.

She had learned to try and hide her emotions early on and right now that came in handy, she didn’t want to be another burden on her children’s shoulders. They were just kids and they should be happy, they didn’t deserve any of this. “Claire! Mom’s here!”, Aden told his older sister excitedly, he was the kind of boy who was always excited for everything, just like his mom was back when Lexa had fallen in love with her. Claire on the other hand seemed to be more like herself, Lexa had often noticed, more distant and somehow a little too serious for her age. “Hey Baby girl!”, Lexa said, hand on her daughter’s shoulder, kissing her hair. “How was school?” “Good”, Claire answered as usual. It was their little daily routine, every day the same question followed by the same answer but these little rituals gave her comfort. Just as the kids presence alone did. There was so much about them that reminded her of her wife, even just the little things gave her so much comfort because she knew that somehow, Costia got to live on, she was never really gone as long as Aden and Claire lived.

“Okay, say goodbye and thank you to grandma and grandpa and we’ll be on our way!”

* * *

"Wait, so you're saying they're literally moving to the other side of the country?", Anya asked in disbelief taking a sip from her beer. Lexa had called her as soon as they had gotten home, she needed to talk to someone who understood her, the person who knew her best. Also, the kids loved it when their auntie came to visit. Anya wasn't the type of person to ever have children of her own but she was one hell of an aunt, she was basically the expression of fun for the kids, even Claire seemed to loosen up and forget all her troubles whenever she was there. "Yes, they are...", Lexa answered emptying her bottle with one gulp. "But you know, the worst thing is that I can't even resent them for that because I get it. That's what they had always wanted to do, what they always used to talk about, moving to the east coast as soon as Richard was retired. And if.. if it had never happened, they would have moved there a year and a half ago... in a way I'm glad they're finally doing it, I don't want them to stay here because of me, because I can't get my shit together... I don't want to be a liability for them, I never wanted that..."

The person talking in that moment was a version of Lexa that Anya had had to get used to again after Costia was gone. Her little sister had always been like that, no matter how good she had done in school or in sports or however many reasons she could've had to be proud of herself, Lexa had always seemed to resent herself a little. That was until she had met Costia at university, after some time Lexa had learned to let someone else in, to trust someone else and to let someone else believe in her. Anya had never seen her like that before, suddenly Lexa seemed to be so much happier and lighter, so much more free but after Costia's death she was quick to become her old self again... she seemed to hold herself responsible for everything bad that had ever happened to her. It hurt Anya to see her like that but there was not much she could do, everyone dealt differently with such things, she tried to hide her true feelings behind sarcasm and Lexa, sometimes she seemed to feel nothing at all.

"I get it, I really do but I don't think they did that just for you, they knew that the kids needed them to."

"They did but we both know that I needed them more than the kids did. Sometimes I'm scared... scared to forget, to forget what she smelled like, how it felt to hold her and how she held me, what a good mom she was, you know how she always sang their lullabies completely out of tune. It feels like with her, I also lost a part of myself but Richard and Carole, the house... it all just reminds me of her, of when we first met and used to spent college breaks at her parents house, how we used to spent all the holidays there that she loved so much... that's all going to be gone when they move and sell the house."

Anya wasn't really used to so much openess and in general to Lexa being so emotional because she was usually very good at hiding her emotions and at not letting anything get to her but the tears running down her face now made her believe otherwise. She got up from her chair to hug her sister tightly and for the first time in years she didn't push her away, instead she hugged her back even tighter and although neither of them said it, she knew how much they needed each other.

"I don't think anyone of us could ever forget someone like her, Lexy. She will always be in our hearts."

After that, they spent some time exchanging their favorite memories of Costia and somehow talking about her made it feel like she was still there.

"You know you can call be if you need anything, right? No matter when, I'm always there.", Anya said before leaving that night.

"I know, An, thank you!"

"Always. So what are you going to do now? Do you need someone to look after the kids?"

"I will have to get a nanny or something to look after them. It's not ideal but right now with my new position I can't cut hours or step back at work..."

"And you shouldn't, you love your job. But you should take care of that as soon as possible."

"I know, I have already posted an ad online and apparently I'm meeting someone named Clarke tomorrow afternoon for a job interview."


	3. The Interview

Clarke was very proud of herself, she was early for her job interview – the first time in ages that she was early for something as she usually tended to be late for things. That was just how she was, few things could really stress her, Clarke was just calm and laid back, a trait that was very practical for her job.

Still, she had no idea what kind of person would ever schedule a job meeting at 7 am within such short notice. _A very busy person obviously_ she thought to herself looking around as she turned into Magnolia Avenue where the Woods family lived. This was the kind of neighborhood where people could really afford a nanny. Big palm trees lined the street, behind them impressive houses and little mansions. Suddenly Clarke felt ashamed of her little one bedroom apartment but then again she knew that she could do better if she just accepted her parents money. It was just that she didn’t want that, she was always so proud of how she had managed to stay afloat and still being able to afford her own apartment. She knew that there was nothing to be ashamed of but this neighborhood seemed kind of intimidating.

When she reached number 27 it was 6.53 am. After exiting her car she took a look around. This was a very nice house, which also seemed to have a big backyard and maybe also a pool if she was lucky enough. She took a deep breath and a short look into the tinted windows of the SUV that was parked in the driveway, she had opted for a very natural look today as she did most days – who would want wannabe model to take care of their children anyways?

She rang the doorbell and not even a second later the door was opened and a pair of green eyes looked her up and down. Clarke was surprised because she didn’t expect the woman to be waiting for her right behind the door.

“Good morning! You must be Clarke Griffin, right?”, the woman asked without even the hint of something like a smile. And if Clarke had not known any better she would have thought that the woman was looking right through her. For a moment she had even wondered if the other woman.

“Good morning! Yes that’s me!”, Clarke answered nevertheless trying to sound as friendly and optimistic as she probably could. She shook the hand that was in turn extended to her and shook it.

“My name is Lexa Woods, it’s nice to meet you Clarke. And you’re early, that’s very good. Come on in.”, this time she sounded less reserved and more friendly. Following Lexa Woods inside, Clarke noticed how well toned her body was. Maybe this woman needed a nanny because she spent a tremendous amount of time at the gym. She didn’t just seem strong and fit though, she was also very pretty, Clarke had to admit. Lexa Woods was dressed in a pair of dark blue skinny jeans, a plain white shirt and a black blazer paired with some black Chelsea boots and she pulled that look of like a boss. Of course Clarke had already done some research on her potential new employer and she’s had a look at Lexa Woods’ very impressive career. At the age of only 32 she had just recently become editor in chief of LA magazine, making her the youngest head editor in the history of the magazine which was very admirable.

* * *

Lexa was very pleased with her first candidate of choice for the nanny position. The girl had arrived on time, even a little earlier although she had to admit that 7 am was a very unusual time for a job interview.

“Sorry again for rescheduling our interview on such short notice, it got very busy at work yesterday and I could under no circumstances have left early.”, she apologized to the blonde girl and motioned for her to sit down on the little seating area that was placed just before one entered the living area. She didn’t mention that it was actually Anya’s fault that she’s had to reschedule the meeting but she didn’t feel very comfortable lying to Clarke because she knew she wasn’t really good at that.

Anya had called her at work yesterday and for some reason insisted that she should also come to the interview because she was afraid Lexa had poor judgement and she cared so much about her nephew and her niece. Lexa knew that the real reason was probably just that Anya was being nosy but on the other hand maybe it was not too bad that she was there with her because Lexa had no idea how to conduct such an interview and four eyes and ears would definitely see and hear more than two.

“Good morning!”, Anya said approaching Clarke from behind where she was sitting which left the blonde looking startled. “Oh sorry, I forgot to mention, this is my sister Anya, the kids’ aunt. She is also going to be a part of our interview if that’s okay for you. It’s just that we want to make sure to find _the_ right person for the kids.”, she explained quickly.

“Sure, that’s alright. It’s nice to see that you care so much about the kids’ wellbeing.”

So far Lexa was impressed with Clarke Griffin. Her résumé had been a pleasure to read as someone who was looking for a reliable nanny. She was a student of educational theory and intended to work as a nursery school teacher after finishing her studies. In addition to that she had lots of experience as a nanny, even back from when she was a teenager and all that made her the perfect candidate for the role as a nanny for Aden and Claire.

“Okay so tell us a bit about yourself, Clarke.”, Anya started the conversation and of course she would. She sat right next to Lexa, her legs crossed, and acted as if she didn’t know a single thing about Clarke, as if she hadn’t checked all social media platforms she knew the night before. An idea that Lexa would never have come up with on her own as for her it felt like she was somehow invading into the blonde’s private life which was basically none of her business as her potential employer. Clarke Griffin didn’t seem to spend that much online though, she had a Facebook account that had not been updated since 2014 and she was on Instagram where she had posted lots of photos of her being on vacation or celebrating with her friends. Also, according to her profile she was not in a relationship but it wasn’t like everyone decided to put their relationships on social media and then again, that was none of Lexa’s business.

“Sure, so my name is Clarke Griffin as you already know, I’m 24 years old and I’m currently studying educational theory. I have started college a bit later than usual because as many other people I wasn’t so sure what I wanted to do with my life after High School. That’s why I decided to travel for some time and then I ended up staying in Europe for a year working as an au-pair. I had always loved children and looking after them and everything but it wasn’t really until then that I realized that that’s what I’d like to do for a living. I’d also like to think that I am a very creative person, I like painting and music, I’ve been playing the piano for 12 years now and I love it very much. I also love cooking though I prefer the Mediterranean cuisine and… yeah that’s about it. What else would you like to know?”

She seemed to be very open and kind, the smile on her face was genuine Lexa could tell because it also reached her eyes, Lexa liked that.

“And what about relationships? Are you in a relationship?”, Anya did never really mince matters but this kind of went too far. “Anya!”, she intervened quickly. Her sister just looked at her, puzzled, as if she didn’t know that such a question might make Clarke feel uncomfortable. “What?”, she said completely unaware. “I don’t see why this question would be of any importance in a job interview.”

“If I might interject”, Clarke suddenly said, seeming slightly amused which made Lexa feel sheepish for making such a fuss about a simple question. “I do actually see why that might be important to know for a position as a nanny but as of right now, I’m single and I don’t think that that is going to change for a while.” Lexa immediately wondered why someone like Clarke might say something like that, had she also been hurt in the past? She stopped herself right then and there, this was a problem. If she was going to hire Clarke to look after the kids should not get that invested in the blonde’s private life.

After covering that basic information Clarke needed to know such as how many hours she would be working, how much Lexa would pay her and telling her about the kids, the conversation came to an end. Lexa was pleased with how it went and she was pretty sure she was going to hire Clarke Griffin but she wanted to talk to Anya again and also to the kids before her final decision. “Alright, thank you Clarke, it was very nice to meet you. We’re going to meet some more candidates during the day but we will probably call tomorrow morning when we made our final decision.”

Lexa was oblivious to how formal that sounded and Anya had to suppress her laughter. Her sister took these things way too seriously and she really needed to loosen up but maybe that was something that a person like Clarke could help her with.

Lexa saw her to the door and returned with a little smile. “She’s perfect for the job.”

“Of course you’d think that.”, Anya said smirking.

“What does that mean?”, Lexa asked, furrowing her brows.

“I mean she might also be the perfect fit for another job.”, Anya said wiggling her eyebrows. The last time she had done that was probably back in college when she used to tease Lexa for obviously thirsting for Costia. This time though Lexa looked even more quizzical. Anya took a deep breath seemingly annoyed with her sister’s obliviousness.

“All I’m saying is she is totally your type.”

Lexa didn’t answer anything, instead she turned around and went to the kitchen so Anya didn’t see that she was blushing.

* * *

“Clarkey, hey!”, Raven greeted her when she arrived at the bar where her best friend had been working for almost two years now. Clarke had spent the whole day studying from home as some important tests were coming up. Now she was kind of tired, she definitely needed a drink.

“Hey Rae! How are you?”

“How are you I should ask. How was your interview?”

“Uhm pretty good I think, at least I hope so.”, actually Clarke had a very good feeling about how the interview went and she was almost certain that she would meet Lexa’s kids very soon but she didn’t want to jinx it by saying it out loud.

“Good good and what is she really like Miss Lexa Woods? As hot as she looks on the little photo of the editorial article page of _LA magazine_?”, Raven smirked wiggling her eyebrows. When they had been searching for Lexa online Raven had already commented several times on how hot she was and that she was totally Clarke’s type. Clarke on the other hand wasn’t so sure about that, Lexa was probably too old for her and she already had a family and everything. Clarke from three years ago, the one who’s nick name had been _party girl Griffin_ she would have probably gone for it but she was a lot more responsible now and she really wanted that job. And also, she wasn’t really ready yet to let someone else in.

“Hm I think you’re confusing hot with intimidating… but yes, she is kinda hot I guess.”, Clarke finally answered pretending to look around the bar to hide the blush on her cheeks.


End file.
